Let's say you are brushing your teeth and you are suddenly smitten with the idea of a good squat in the 3-foot high shower. No problem. Keeping brushing. Fill the bucket with hot water. Dump on your head. Fill the bucket again. Dump. Repeat. But wait! Good heavens, can you? Why yes, you certainly may. If the urge should suddenly hit you while brushing and dumping water, you can also see to a certain pressing need without missing a single beat. It's heaven. Now, you're brushing, dumping, AND sitting on the potty. Such bliss.
But there's more. Since you're blind as a bat without your glasses and your chances are near 100 percent that you're going to come face to face with some crawly, creepy, slithering creature, the whole scenario speeds up to WARP speed. Brush, dump water, potty, put on your glasses, check for varmints, brush, dump water, potty, put on your glasses, check for varmints. Rinse. Repeat.
And more. Plan for power outages. Lots of power outages. Practice this routine in the dark. Try to remember where you planted your feet. That's VERY important because you are not going to want to move for a few minutes until the power comes thundering back on again. Just in time to come eye to eye with that huge Gecko on the wall, or millipede . . . . . .or spider . . . . . . or a giant frog in the sink. Or a snake slithering along the wall.
Coming to you live (at least for one more day) from India, that nation of eternal bliss and joy - the 3-in-1 bath system. Built for you upon your request. I'll throw in the wildlife for free.
Betty, should you go back to India after you return to the states you might want to take a battery powered lantern and hang it in the shower. You could even turn it on before you start your business. Then if the power goes off you will still have light. You might also want to take an LED headlamp instead of that unreliable flashlight.
ReplyDeleteDang. I knew all of this. Please, don't anyone take me on any survival trips.
DeleteThis reminds me of the movie What's Up Doc, when the hotel staff searches a woman's room with the excuse that a guest has lost a pet snake. He tells the woman to hide in the bathroom, claiming "snakes have a deadly fear of... tile." If only that were true!
ReplyDeleteSo your new mantra is "Brush,dump....DUMP,check" It is time to start your countdown to coming home!!!! di
ReplyDelete39 days! I guarantee you that we'll be building you a chicken coop that is more liveable than what most Indians live in.
DeleteDidn't anyone tell you living in India would feel like camping, minus the 5 star amenities of the KOA? Seriously, the fact that you don't have a proper shower head kinda stinks. Probably not knowing any of this prior to your arrival was for the better. It makes for great blog posts.
ReplyDeleteYes, I get to make fun of virtually everything and everyone. Except the Indian people. I love them. Here in Tamil Nadu, it's still quite a traditional culture reflected by traditional dress and a traditional culture, hardly any of it very healthy. But the people are wonderful in spite of everything. I was definitely in for some major surprises. I'll be glad to be going home. I like India once in a while, but mostly I hate it. That probably comes through pretty clearly on my blog.
ReplyDeleteBetty, you make me laugh. I can't even imagine with my height, how fun that shower would be. My knees might get cleaned! You are always in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the prayers, Christine. I have never needed them quite so much. And I'm praying for Spencer, also. I think I know a little bit about what he's in for, but if he's obedient and does EVERYTHING he's asked to do, he'll be protected.
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